Thoughts: The Bachelor NZ

And every other permutation of Bachelor, Bachelorette, MAFS etc etc.

Just … No.

I can’t see how these shows are healthy. I can’t see how teaching our teenage girls that it’s ok to compete for the affections of a guy. In a fake, contrived bubble to make it worse.

Nope. Can’t watch it. Can’t support it. 

Judge me.

Thoughts: Focus on the Positive


Over on Facebook I’ve been posting a ‘Good Thing of the Day’ each day this year.

Why?

It has occurred to me that we spend far to much time thinking and worrying about the bad things. And not only the bad things that actually happen and impact us but also the imaginary bad things we dream up that could possibly happen. 

Some of you know that the last couple of years for me have been fairly challenging. 
Thankfully I am wired that I tend to not let these challenges occupy my head too much, but there are definitely times when the dark twin comes out of the shadows and reveals himself. 

I have learned to focus only on the things that I can control and change, and I am actively engaged in this process at present. I have zero control over the actions of others. I have total control over how I respond (note: not react).

My positivity posts are designed to reinforce one idea: That no matter how crappy your day is, there has to be One Good Thing that you can find. I have found it to be incredibly useful for me to take a few minutes, disengage from the busy-ness and simply reflect. Reflect on the people met. The conversations had. The tasks completed. The new thing tried. The successes. The opportunities.

The more I’ve done this, the more my outlook has changed. It gets easier to see the good things in my life, and easier to acknowledge these good things. It gets easier to be grateful for the good things. And easier to express my gratitude.

Will I continue to do this? Yes. Will I continue to post to Facebook at the risk of being boring and repetitive? Probably. I don’t have an endless supply of cat GIFs after all.

Thoughts: Whoa! Studios – Henderson, Auckland

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This is new to Auckland. Very new.

We visited Whoa! Studios to celebrate the birthday of a Mum as it promised good food, wine and lots of great distractions for the kids.

This place is fantastic. Seriously great.

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It was heaving with families despite the weather being a tad unhelpful. Our first distraction was the urban playground – fabulously thought out and executed. The centerpiece being this phenomenal Whoa!Web crochet construction which took two years to create.

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The Grounds:

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We were put up in a private room which had great ambience – perfect for our family group.

The service was superb (they were able to adjust for our needs – i.e. feed the kids first so there is more room for the adults once they vanish) and the kitchen catered for a variety of dietary requirements easily.

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The food was outstanding. We were served Asian-fusion Tapas – from kimchi to kingfish to steak. Absolutely perfectly cooked and the flavours were perfect. My understanding is that there is a strong focus on seasonal ingredients, and as close to local as possible. Apparently the tomatoes we ate were from the garden of an elderly local woman. This is just awesome in my book.

I loved the decor. It’s a beautiful room.

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Then there’s the whole theatre and show experience for the kids. Probably aimed at the under-10’s but Miss 13 enjoyed it. There were layers of humor that would fly over the understanding of children but would entertain the parents.

The lobby and entry to the show is great. It really sets the scene.

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Everything about Whoa! Studios has been thought through and executed to a really high standard. I’m super-impressed.

I have no hesitation in recommending this for a fun family experience. I will definitely return.

Thoughts: Camping 2017

For the last five or so years, I have instituted a bit of a ritual: taking my kids away to a campsite somewhere in New Zealand for a week. The idea is simply to get closer to them and to expose them to what this country has to offer outside of hotel rooms and big cities.

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They do look forward to it and we have successfully found that necessary balance between device-time and interacting with each other and the surroundings we find ourselves in.

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This year was a bit different. I decided to book a site at the Waitomo Top 10. The idea was to explore the glow worm caves and several others. I’m a bit mean actually: my daughter (11) hasn’t ever been all that comfortable in underground tunnels (for example, those found on North Head in Auckland) so I thought this might be a good way to encourage her to deal with her fears.

 

What I hadn’t considered is that her fears weren’t limited to tunnels. It turns out that her list includes tunnels, caves, dark, bugs, wetas, sounds of water, drips… and we managed to find all those things in one tidy package.

 

So when one of our guides told us that he did things that no other guide did, such as turning off all the lights, the look of betrayal my daughter gave me was quite special. I laughed.

 

She coped admirably and grudgingly admits that there were aspects of the adventuring she enjoyed. Stalactites and stalagmites made the list.

 

Katherine and her daughter joined us for two nights which was fun. It created a change in our usual dynamic which isn’t a bad thing. Change is good as they say.

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Waitomo. What can I say? Majestic natural wonderlands underground. And more to to point, the organisations overseeing these treasures have created something great. I have harboured a default position where I suspect New Zealand tourism businesses do things a bit on the cheap and end up with an overpriced experience for tourists that ultimately is a bit shit. I’m happy to say that in the case of Waitomo, this perception is dead wrong. I felt pride in what we (Kiwis) are showing people here.

 

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I also love getting off the beaten track a bit. We went to Marokopa on the West coast (47kms West of Waitomo) to see what was there. Not that much in truth, but there is a seaside community, great fishing off the bar, coffees available en route and some beautiful scenery. I loved it. The kids… well, not so much.

 

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That being said, I love seeing how my kids are growing and maturing. Each year they’re a little bit less useless and more autonomous. They’re not requiring my help with keeping them entertained quite as much. They’re able to (and actually take personal responsibility for) their showers, doing dishes, hanging togs and towels etc.

 
The Waitomo Top 10 is also pretty cool. It’s not as big as other campsites we’ve visited, and the population is more transient. There’s not much to do beyond visiting the caves. In hindsight I think perhaps 2 nights there and then somewhere else may have been a better option.

 
It was so good seeing close up how important tourism is to our country. In the course of the week I’ve had decent conversations with people from France, Germany, Australia, the US and more. All are here with a sense of wonderment. All are here to experience something quite unique in the world, and they were getting it.

 
An aside: I note that Mercedes pretty much owns the campervan market. They’re doing something right!

 

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All up, a very good week. A chance to reconnect with my kids and spend time with them outside of routine. It’s valuable. And there is nothing better than getting just a little bit feral before addressing the new work year.

 

That being said, I am ready for it now!

Thoughts: A Quick Return Home

In January I headed to Palmerston North for a family wedding. 
Palmerston North is my home town. I haven’t actually been there for about six years, and before that there was at least a ten year gap between visits. 

It was interesting to see my childhood home. The schools I attended. Driving around my old paper route and noting little change in the houses I used to deliver to. Seeing the lawns I used to mow relatively unscathed by the passage of time.


I was struck by a sense of malaise. 

There’s a gradual deterioration that those living day to day in this place don’t seem to notice, as it happens under their noses. It seems that house owners are neglecting their assets. Homes that I remember being quite lovely in my youth are now run down. This may be the curse of absentee landlords taking advantage of student rents? 


Perhaps arriving in to town on a rainy, bleak day coloured my perception. Palmy is quite lovely on a good day. 

In January there is also an absence of students, which would account for a lack of vibe and the low energy ebb.

I also do not understand the non-sensical paid carparking at the Plaza. It serves little purpose and it’s badly organised.

There are some good things to note. I was impressed with a bar called Brewers Apprentice (their playlist included Wang Chung). I loved the short travel times between destinations. I love that it’s really, really flat (perfect for running and cycling) and I love that there is a low cost of entry to home ownership. I found that people were friendly and conversational.

The wedding service was in Feilding. I was impressed with that town. It seems to be starting to get ‘gentrified’. Wide streets, nice shops and eateries and still only minutes from Palmerston North airport. 

Feilding triggered a fun memory. I remember riding my bike from PN to Feilding to see a girl I liked. She worked in a dairy. I bought a milkshake. I was too shy to say anything about that, so I rode home. 

I really didn’t do my teenage years right in retrospect.

It was nice to get back there, on balance. I don’t think I’m going to rush back anytime soon though. I think the myopic optimistic memories of youth are best left intact.

Thoughts: Personal Grooming and Domestic Bliss

Ok ok. You all know that guys are gross, right? They move in and your clinically clean and tidy world is utterly disrupted. But you put up with it, because for some reason, you quite like having their stupid faces around.

But here’s the big un-asked, non-discussed question which every guy needs to know the answer to, but is afraid to ask:

Nail clipping. What’s the deal? Surely EVERYONE does it, but why is it a problem when us guys say that we are going to do it?

We get complaints when our nails are long and unkempt. We get complaints when they’re looking a bit rough. So when we actually want to do something about it, it’s gross and disgusting? Really?

So, to help the cause of partner harmony, please advise me (us) on the following:

– when should we clip (and under what circumstances)

– where should we clip (and under what circumstances)

– when do you clip (and under what circumstances)

– where do you clip (and under what circumstances)

And why is it gross to talk about it? 

Diary of a Shore Thing #5

I’ve reached the age where I have started to obsess about power tools and have a desire to do creative things with wood. I think it’s the need to be able to just switch off a little bit.

Anyway, I’ve made a start with my Ryobi collection, but it has occurred to me that I don’t have the space for some of the tools that i would quite like.

Enter a manly conversation with my neighbour. He’s quite handy, an architect I believe, and he’s been busy building stuff around his house. He has all the tools. 

He mentioned a place, the Devonport Community Workshop, secreted away off Lake Rd. It’s been around for over 20 years, has many of the ‘big’ tools (table saws, drop saws, bandsaws, jigsaws, lathes, routers, sanders etc.) that we all want but can’t really justify purchasing ourselves, and is run by a team of volunteers. 

I popped in for a look-see on this bleak stormy Saturday morning.


It’s open Monday-Saturday, 9am-12 noon and is funded by donations received for use.

I think I may have found a gem.